Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Stocking stalking

Our stockings are hung. And these pictures are pretty embarrassingly bad.

First off, an aside. The plants seem to be doing ok inside! My orchid is even throwing off a new flower spike, which I tried--and failed--to capture in this picture.

Stockings are so much fun because it's all about how stuffing something small but meaningful into a very limited space (that's what she said!). Last year, I found these Santa stockings that somebody's grandma had clearly lovingly handknit. They don't have our names on them, so just for a day, I'm Frank and Marc is Mary Anne. It keeps things spicy.

Shopping for stockings is maybe my favorite part of holiday prep. I can't really say what's going in Marc's because he reads this. I have, however, been in charge of my mom's stocking since I graduated college. I volunteered for the job, and I have a lot of fun doing it. Despite bookmarking this site on my mom's computer for her convenience, I'm pretty sure she doesn't read it. This means you can expect a lot of racy posts about drugs and sex and all sorts of things that drive her crazy. (Such as me eating food that has fallen on the floor, trying to open packaging with my teeth and improper folding techniques.)

ANYWAY, here's a list of a few things that might make fun stocking stuffers. Some of these are geared specifically toward my mom's stocking, and the others are just inexpensive, jazzy things I've ferreted away in my "Ideas" "I am an inveterate consumer magpie" folder:

1. Earring backs. I actually received these in my stocking one year. I tend to misplace these faster than I used to lose Barbie shoes when I was a kid. Super handy and it means you don't have to cannibalize your other earrings that actually came with backs, which I'm back to doing now that I've lost all my spares.

2. Clear hair ties. Just a personal preference here. Clear, inconspicuous and strong. They're like the vodka of hair accessories.

3. Nutella. Tasty and something I'd never buy for myself but would consume in about a week.

4. Silver polish. Just get the toothpaste size. Even if you don't have much silver, it will come in handy for shining up jewelry and lots of other metal that happens to be around the house. You have to keep your meat cleaver nice and pretty now, you know?

5. Cheese knife or some sort of serving piece. IMO, It's nice to put something a bit fancy you're going to keep and use in a stocking. If you do it one piece at a time, you're not going to break the bank, but you're going to help the giftee build up a nice collection of serving pieces. Vintage is an awesome way to go on this one too.

6. Bicycle bell. More practical than you'd think if you know someone who rides a bike. Imagine driving a car with no horn....

7. Vintage masking tape. Just pretty and frivolous. To make up for the bell, I guess.

8. Tillandsia. Would look nice peeking out of the top of the stocking. My mom is obsessed with these, but her giant scary Maine Coon cats (she has three and they're terrifying) keep eating them.

9. Pistachios. These and cheap red wine are like crack for my mom.

10. Stationary. For writing your thank-you notes, of course!

If all else fails, just stuff a big bottle of wine in the stocking. I don't think you'd hear many complaints about that.


Anonymous said...

hahahaha are you a *that's what she said* fanatic too?!

My mom also bookmarked my blog, but I don't think she knows what a blog is and that I update it everyday. I think she only read the two first posts. So I, too, think I'm in the clear. However, my boyfriend just asked if he could share my blog with his mother; he had told her I had one and she wants to read it. So today's plans involve going through all 300 entries and making sure I didn't write anything particularly racy about her son. Damnit.

Anonymous said...

I love decorating for the holidays. And I love your blog!

erin@designcrisis said...

Great ideas! I especially love the idea of getting knives in my stocking, heh heh. The vintage masking tape is genius, and I love all your plants. I stupidly left mine outside and then Austin had a freak freeze, and now... well, god rest their little plant souls :(

Stephanie said...

I love the stockings too! I go all out and love that I get to do them for Josie and Maggie now too. I help with my mom's stocking as well. Your blog makes me laugh all of the time and I love the pictures. Really, I laugh out loud at so many of your posts!

Alison said...

Aww, Steph! Thanks so much.

P. Whiter said...

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